


Now I See

by kitnkabootle



Category: Silkwood (1983)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-15
Updated: 2013-07-15
Packaged: 2017-12-20 07:56:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/884847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitnkabootle/pseuds/kitnkabootle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An alternate look at Silkwood with a Dolly/Karen twist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Now I See

"Jesus, Dolly." Karen half-sighs and tips the ashes off her cigarette.

Dolly laughs through tears, nuzzling her back into Dolly's side as one finger plays with the denim cladding Karen's thigh. "Well..." Dolly starts but doesn't finish. A wave of emotion crashes down on her and her face crumples.

She feels Karen's hand close around her shoulder and she leans her head against the warm nook of Karen's neck as she's pulled into an embrace. It's a friendly embrace and Dolly can't help but let out another small, ironic laugh. She doesn't want to be Karen's friend.

Her knees work, edging the swing into a gentle ebb and pull and Dolly's hand caresses Karen's arm as it holds her own. Karen's breath is at her temple and Dolly, for a moment, is brave enough to tilt her chin towards that warmth.

The swing's chains clink ever so softly around them and the darkness surrounding their home is almost comforting to Dolly as her eyes finally meet Karen's.

Karen is looking back at her, but unlike other times when their eyes have met, Karen doesn't look away. There's something in her gaze that makes Dolly's heart relax and her stomach flutter pleasantly. Her stomach has never 'fluttered' before.

Her hand leaves Karen's arm and tentatively presses against Karen's cheek. She isn't shrugged off and Dolly feels her hand go hot and clammy against the curve of Karen's cheekbone. Her body feels as though it is strung as tightly as a banjo, but she finds give when she cranes her neck upwards, bringing her lips inches from Karen's.

Karen's eyes widen briefly and then relax and Dolly watches as Karen lowers her chin to cover those few inches between them. Their lips meet and Dolly is both frightened and nervous. She wants this feeling to go on forever and she is painfully aware that Karen is going to realize what she's doing and shove her away.

Karen doesn't shove her away and Dolly moans audibly when she feels Karen's lips shift and move against hers. The sound sets off another warning bell. Her eyes open and she is looking into Karen's also-open eyes, and for a minute she feels Karen's lips stiffen and still.

Dolly is about to pull back and to apologize in an attempt to preserve their friendship, which feels as though it's balancing on a tight-rope, but Karen's eyes close again and when they do her lips begin moving again.

Dolly's mouth parts and she tests the waters as her tongue eases along Karen's lower lip. Karen accepts the bait and Dolly feels a shiver shudder through her whole body when she feels Karen's tongue tasting her own.

This is all Dolly has wanted ever since the morning she knew that she had fallen in love with her roommate. Since then it has been a nightmare of long evenings being the third wheel and even longer nights of laying in bed, listening to the bed creak in the room beside her and knowing that Karen and Drew aren't sleeping.

One particularly restless night, when she'd gotten up to get a beer from the fridge to clear her mind, she'd noticed the door to Drew and Karen's bedroom slightly ajar. It was only a few inches of dim lighting that tipped her off, but Dolly hadn't turned the kitchen light on as she should have. She didn't even make banging or rustling noises to startle the coupling pair.

She had stood just off of the bedroom and looked inside, the guilt burning her cheeks as she watched Karen astride Drew. She was naked and Dolly memorized the curves of Karen's slight body; her sternum and clavicle, her ribs shifting behind thin skin, her darkened nipples centered on her small breasts.

Her skin had been bathed in a sheen of sweat and her cheeks were flushed as her hips rolled up and down on top of Drew's body. Dolly even blushed to remember how often she'd replayed the scene in her mind and in her own bed.

And now, here she is, her mouth molded against Karen's. Their tongues are wet and Dolly is embarrassed at just how likewise the rest of her body is responding. She doesn't know what has caused Karen's changed mind, but it exhilarates her.

She moves her hand down Karen's shoulder to caress her breast through the thin fabric of her shirt. As usual, Karen isn't wearing a bra and Dolly can feel her nipple pebbled hard beneath her grasp. She flexes her fingers and Karen sharply intakes her breath. Dolly's fingers instinctively stop and she moves to pull her hand away, feeling she's gone too far.

But when she does, Dolly feels Karen's hand on hers, pressing it back to the flesh it had vacated and Karen moans and whispers softly into her ear, "I want this."

Dolly's whole body feels like it's on fire and she recaptures Karen's lips, her hand sliding down to Karen's waist where it edges beneath Karen's shirt and rises up to feel the bare skin beneath. She can feel Karen's nipple hard against her palm and she swirls her fingertips around it.

Karen arches into her touch and their lips part briefly. Dolly can't believe that everything is falling so precisely in line with all that she has dreamed of. This time, when Karen speaks, there's an urgency in her voice. "I need this."

Dolly looks into Karen's eyes and finally realizes what this is about. What it's all about. Dolly feels as though someone has pulled a rug out from under her. She knows why Karen wants this and why she needs this.  
An escape from reality.

It follows talks of getting up and leaving this place and moving on. Karen is frightened by all of the change around them and she is holding on to Dolly as some semblance of what will remain the same.

Dolly feels sadness mix into the desire filling her belly and despite what her mind is telling her to do, she lowers herself to the old wooden planks of the farmhouse.

Her fingers roughly tug at the buttons on Karen's jeans and Karen helps her undo them and pull them away. They are discarded somewhere beside them, but Dolly doesn't pay them another thought as she kneels between the legs of the embodiment of her desire.

Her feelings are unrequited. Dolly knows that the person kneeling between Karen's legs could be Drew or any other man... maybe woman for that matter, if it was not her.

But Dolly's hands coax Karen's knees even further apart and she leans forward, her mouth seeking the space just beneath the small patch of hair that Dolly had seen before and had since memorized like the back of her own hand.

Her tongue coaxes a cry from Karen's lips and her arms bend back above her head and close around the top rung on the wooden swing. Dolly can see that Karen's eyes are closed and her cheek is pressed into her own bicep. Her sweet oval mouth is open and breath is leaving it in uneven gasps as the flat of Dolly's tongue glides inside the hot lake of moisture between Karen's legs.

Dolly enjoys every taste, smell, and sound as Karen's thighs tighten below her hands. She lifts her eyes and watches as Karen arches into her touch and as she comes closer and closer to release. All too soon that release crashes upon her and Karen's head rolls back. "Yes... oh g--, g--, god...ye--"

Then Karen stops making any sound at all and her whole body goes so tight beneath Dolly that it's almost as if she's made of marble. Karen's voice returns in the form of a "Nngghh.." and her body collapses against the wooden swing with several creaks as it moves in time.

Dolly's mouth is wet and Karen is visibly throbbing, the tender red flesh glistening in the moonlight. She watches it until she feels Karen's knees at her sides and she looks up to see Karen sitting up and closing her legs.

Dolly climbs up and sits on the swing beside Karen, her weight giving them a slight push and rocking them back and forth in silence for several minutes.

When Karen finally breaks the silence, she sounds small and almost childlike. "Dolly, we -- that was--"

"I know, Karen..." and the downwards lilt to her voice shows all too well that she does.

"Don't have to tell me." Dolly shrugs, her black hair falling across her face, thankfully concealing her own embarrassed, shameful blush.

Karen's hand tentatively pats Dolly's shoulder.

Then the swing gives another push as Karen's heated body is removed from the space beside her. Dolly's eyes stare straight ahead, even as she sees Karen in her periphery, picking up her discarded jeans and standing near the door, watching her.

By the time the porch door swings closed, Dolly's cheeks are wet with tears. She nudges a finger between her lips and hugs herself as the night slowly fades to day.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Don't sue! I'm not armed! Both Karen and Dolly belong to the writer of Silkwood, and I guess to Karen Silkwood herself - may she rest in peace.
> 
> Author's note: Happy Birthday to jenc81 ! She has become a very good friend of mine over this last year and I am so lucky to have someone as fabulous as her in my life! Here's to you Jen. Thanks for all the spams, chats and just plain fun. Here's to many more! 
> 
> Originally Posted on LiveJournal - November 10th, 2009


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